Online Dating

I mean, any kind of dating is pathetic as a given, but online dating is the fucking queen of pathetic! I’ve just been to this dating website where half the dudes looked like prisons in Ukraine suddenly provided their inmates with internet access and the other half… Wait, I don’t mean to be rude.

Some of the guys on there were actually very nice – you coudl see their inner warmth and humility in their eyes and facial expressions. And some even seemed hot. But there were several (!) people whose profile pictures (!!!) featured them with a black eye! You hear me?? A BLACK EYE. Come on, now. Seriously, you people? Beer bottles, cigarettes, douche faces, drunk faces, but a black eye?.. This cannot be happening.

So I got all desperate and said fuck it, Imma go search for a female date. And you know what? I just think I picked a wrong site to look for a date at. It’s not that the girls were just as bad, but I know there are much better girls out there online, so I just dumped the whole thing.

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